Taking Flight

Londoners, be advised: air travel is not good for your health. We're speaking directly to those of you with plans to fly abroad in the near future. Especially those with a susceptability to stress and a sneaking dislike for loud, public mobile phone chatter. If the interminable Terminal five nightmare (sorry) were not deterrant enough, then Ofcom's proposals for in-flight mobile bleeps should do it.

Speaking for ourselves, we prefer to fly the way nature intended whenever possible. We stick to balloons and feathers and eh... daydreaming. This helps fend off panic attacks, duty-free splurges and air rage. We urge you all to do the same, and to help you in this....

We've heard great things about The Flight of the Red Balloon -- go see ! Plush cinema seats have to be among the better places to be on a drizzly London weekend, no? Based on Albert Lamorisse's "Le Ballon Rouge", it promises to be a warm, pretty, fantastic flight of fancy.

Or if you guys get enough blinking screen during working hours, why not float in the cosy environs of Gallery 12, South Hill Park? Tobias Hill's "As the Crow Flies" is showing, with bird's eye, coloured linoprints of London that might well send you into raptures, and leave you coming to 20 feet up.

Just whatever you do, stay away from Heathrow ....